Life Together.

That was the title of the sermon on the final Sunday of 2018 at Christ Church Milwaukee. What a fitting summary of what we are called to in this life. Whether within the context of marriage, family, community, church, or work, all of us are doing “life together” in some capacity. The message outlined the simple components necessary to pursue this calling well . . . 1) Cultivate a deep love for one another. 2) Have a confident hope in what God is doing.  3) Live with an expectation for continual growth.

The timing of this message was fitting for me as I find myself back in an “undeclared” season of life. With our youngest child entering preschool in the fall of 2019, my role as a stay-at-home mom will shift. And in full disclosure, I don’t know what I want to be “when I grow up” despite having a clinical doctorate in a profession that I love. As I listened to the Truth being proclaimed, I found myself hearing not only what God was teaching me as 2018 came to a close but also what He has been teaching me since I entered into the covenant of marriage with my best friend.

I met my husband when we were both “undeclared” freshmen in college. We each had our own independent passions and pursuits when we met. Yet we eagerly intertwined these life goals when we chose to get married before our senior year of college. The unfolding of our story that started during our freshman year of college and has now continued over nearly two decades has been equal parts expected and unpredictable. But one beautiful and complicated aspect of getting married young was that our God-given ambitions and goals were no longer merely individual dreams and desires but rather OUR dreams and desires. And over the course of our doing “life together,” these dreams and desires have been directed and ordained by God. We are not writing the story. He is.

But truth be told, this unfolding of our story and uniting of our dreams—professional goals, family hopes, personal desires, and unvoiced dreams—have been challenging. This process requires sacrifice on both of our parts. And these sacrifices look different for each of us, and they shift with the changing seasons of our life together. The continual “dying to self” process is a struggle! And the commitment to placing our corporate growth and good as a couple and now also as a family of six over and above our individual aspirations, hopes, and dreams often seems unfair, unreasonable, and occasionally downright undesirable.

Yet we both hold to the promise that God, who began a good work in each of us and in our marriage when the two of us became one, will bring our story to completion. Although I do not know what 2019 will hold for my husband, my family, or myself, I am confident that God will equip us to faithfully follow Him. He has endowed us with the Holy Spirit to fulfill our various roles, roles that are from Him, through Him, and to Him. And although at the age of 37 I still may not know what I want to be when I grow up, I am certain that He has called me to simply be faithful right where I am.

To simply love deeply.

To simply have confident hope in what He is doing.

To simply expect continual growth.